So, this entry has been sparked by yet another argument with my mother about church.
I am not a fan of church.
I'm jealous of all those people that can be so crazy devoted to a religion. (Well, except the terrorist/Muslim extremist types)
I just sometimes wish I could believe this things without doubting everything and sleeping during Mass and such.
I mean I can't even remember to stay away from what I gave up for Lent! (unless I'm around awesome people that are remembering)
I think the worst part of all is teaching little kids about Catholicism, but then not believing most of it myself. I feel like such a fake. I'm so detached from it, I could be teaching them math. I think I believe more in Elizabeth I and Gloria Steinem than the Apostles and Saints.
I wish I had the devotion I had when I was in 6th grade, before I turned into a bratty, sarcastic teenager. Maybe, if that happened, I wouldn't want to convert to Judaism or go Buddhist.
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If we're talking about cool female leaders, you should add Maria Theresa and Catherine II. Catherine had like 20 lovers.
ReplyDeleteWould you really like to be devoted to the point of blind obedience? I think I am better off when I question things.
I used to wish, while in Sunday school, that I knew Bible stuff and had a faith, that I knew God.
ReplyDeleteNow I don't believe in God at all. I'm okay with it.
Well, Andrea, I know all that Bible stuff pretty much. Not as well as Emaline (spelling?), I suppose. And I have some faith. I'm at least agnostic, even at the worst of times.
ReplyDeleteAnd Samantha, I don't want to have blind faith. But I question things too much, and then I question why I'm questioning. I just sometimes wish to believe something without overthinking it.
Maria Theresa had a couple too many children for my taste. And she didn't put much value into them until they hit puberty or so. She just assumed they might die because "children are weak." Catherine was cool though.